As a musician, artist, contemplative, theologian, and cultural explorer, I find a strange joy in grappling with the larger questions about life and existence. To me, this is the heart and soul of communications — exploring the dynamics of what it means to be human, how we connect and relate with one another, how we cultivate love and growth, and how we perceive ourselves in relation to the wider universe or the Divine. My reflections here are an attempt to capture moments of life — through a canvas of words, songs, images, and reflections — that I hope bring a deeper meaning into focus.
MUSINGS
“We are all in the process of dying,” my friend said, dropping this tidbit of reality on me with the same air of casualness that one might comment on the weather. I was probably in my mid to late twenties when he and I had one of our many conversational debates about something or other, and he’d often raise this point to me. Death was not in the forefront of my mind much then. In fact, as I recall my twenties, I was probably more focused on paying my rent, finishing graduate school, and living out my purpose in life than I was in facing the fact that I was dying.
My sister held the phone up to Margaret’s ear and I could hear her labored breathing. “Hi Margaret, it’s me, Cathy,” I said in a soft voice. I paused, searching for the words to say. “I want you to know how much I love you.” My voice cracked as I tried to hold my emotions back. Could she really hear me? “She only has a few more hours left with us,” my sister said, her own voice trying to hold back the sadness and sobbing she wanted to pour forth.